Parenting twins/triplets+

[sunnydays]

This thread is for parents of twins, triplets, and more to discuss all things related to parenting multiples! Share your experiences, challenges, and tips on topics such as bonding, feeding schedules, managing multiple timelines, and everything else multiply-parenting related!

What's the biggest challenge you've faced in parenting multiples? Do you have any survival tips for fellow parents here? Let's share stories and support each other!

 

[sportytina]

I found balancing individual attention for each child to be the hardest. It seemed someone was always crying - either a baby or toddler, which broke my heart especially when I couldn't pinpoint whose turn it was for cuddles and individual playtime!

My survival strategy involved a lot of planning ahead and organizing 'alone time' for each twin, even if it was just 15 minutes each day to start. I'd also alternate 'special time' throughout the week - one day, my focus would be on Twin A with extra cuddles and special treats; the next day, same for Twin B. That way, they got individual attention every other day, and the routine helped me stay sane! Plus, it meant that each twin got used to waiting their turn and not feeling left out - a skill they'd need throughout childhood (and beyond!).

I'd love to hear your strategies too! It's such an art parenting multiples.

 

[musical]

I found balancing individual attention for each child to be the hardest. It seemed someone was always crying - either a baby or toddler, which broke my heart especially when I couldn't pinpoint whose turn it was for cuddles and individual playtime!

My survival strategy involved a lot of planning ahead and organizing 'alone time' for each twin, even if it was just 15 minutes each day to start. I'd also alternate 'special time' throughout the week - one day, my focus would be on Twin A with extra cuddles and special treats; the next day, same for Twin B. That way, they got individual attention every other day, and the routine helped me stay sane! Plus, it meant that each twin got used to waiting their turn and not feeling left out - a skill they'd need throughout childhood (and beyond!).

I'd love to hear your strategies too! It's such an art parenting multiples.

As a parent of multiples myself, I can definitely relate to the challenges you've faced! Balancing individual attention is a daunting task, and it's heartwarming to see other parents' strategies.

My approach was similar in some ways: organized solo time, but I adopted a more flexible strategy, as my triplets are quite energetic and have distinct personalities. I set aside an hour each weekend for each child, where they got to decide the activities (within reason!). It helped me bond with each of them individually and allowed me to understand their unique interests and needs.

During the week, I'd often pair them up for joint attention, which meant that one-on-one time was more achievable, and no one felt left out. Then, like you, I'd rotate special treats throughout the week so each child had their moment to shine. This strategy helped me get some one-on-one time without the other two demanding attention, as they also knew their special day was coming up!

I agree it's an art, and multiple parents certainly deserve a pat on the back for the extra effort we put into giving individual attention! It's great to share these tips - it might help other desperate parents out there! What challenging situations did you find these strategies helped with the most?

 

[mamamia]

I found that the solo time helped ease some of the jealousy and competition between them. They each got to feel special and knew their siblings had the same opportunity, which reduced some of the tension around shared attention.

The flexible approach worked well because, like you, I found rigid plans often didn't stick! But knowing there was a loose schedule for individual time helped me keep on track.

I also found these strategies helpful when they started school. Each child had developed independence and felt confident going off on their own adventures, as they were used to having some solo time. It made the transition easier, especially as they moved through different classes and extra-curricular activities.

It's great that you mentioned understanding their unique interests - this was a huge benefit for me too and helped in so many ways!

 

[luciana]

That's insightful - planning solo time and being flexible about it. I can see how having a strategy to give each child some independence would help with schooling too, especially as they grow and have different schedules. Knowing you had a system that worked is reassuring!

It's interesting how giving them individual attention helped ease tension around shared attention - seems like a win-win! And good on you for figuring out what works best and being adaptable - I'm sure that's beneficial for so many aspects of parenting multiples. Understanding their different interests must make it easier to tailor those solo times too.

 

[sunnydays]

I think understanding the different interests is the most crucial part, and it's something we focused on from an early age. We'd often ask them who wanted to do what, and go out of our way to give them those individual experiences. Over time, we got better at being spontaneous with it and planning ahead for solo time.

It wasn't always easy - there were many days where nothing went according to plan, but having that strategy definitely helped! And as you said, it's a win-win: they get precious alone time with Mum or Dad, and we get one-on-one time too, which is so special.

Being adaptable is definitely key, especially as they grow and their interests become more varied. We find ourselves constantly reassessing what works best for everyone, and trying new things. But having that solo time strategy in place from the beginning has been a real lifesaver!

 

[sunnybunny]

That's such a great point about being adaptable - it's so important to keep checking in and making sure everyone's needs are met as the children grow and their interests change. And it sounds like you've found a great way of giving them individual attention while also teaching them about independence!

 

[luciana]

Thank you! Yes, being adaptable is definitely one of the most important things I've learned as a parent to multiples - it's all about going with the flow and making sure no one feels left out. I make sure to have some alone time with each kiddo, which they love, while also encouraging them to play independently and develop their own interests. It's a balance but so worthwhile!

 

[queenie]

Adaptability is key, and creating those individual bonds is so important - sounds like you've found a great routine! I love the idea of having alone time with each twin, it's a wonderful way to foster connection and ensure no one feels left out. And yes, going with the flow is such a vital skill to learn; easier said than done but sounds like you're nailing it!

 

[sunnybunny]

Thank you! We try to schedule some one-on-one time with each twin weekly, and it's made a huge difference in our bonds with them. They get special time with mum or dad, and we get to know each twin individually too. It's harder to do this now that they're older and busier, but we make it work! And yes, going with the flow is a skill I'm proud of - definitely didn't think I'd be here, ha! But necessity is the mother of invention, right?

 

[koala]

Thank you! We try to schedule some one-on-one time with each twin weekly, and it's made a huge difference in our bonds with them. They get special time with mum or dad, and we get to know each twin individually too. It's harder to do this now that they're older and busier, but we make it work! And yes, going with the flow is a skill I'm proud of - definitely didn't think I'd be here, ha! But necessity is the mother of invention, right?

I can relate to what you said about making time for individual bonding getting harder as the kids grow older and more independent. It's a reminder that we have to seize those opportunities while they're young!

 

[musical]

I can relate to what you said about making time for individual bonding getting harder as the kids grow older and more independent. It's a reminder that we have to seize those opportunities while they're young!

Absolutely! The early years are so crucial for setting the tone, it seems. Forming those strong bonds when they're curious and affectionate helps so much with the independence that comes later! You never know when those little dates will come in handy, either - I find mine love having something to look forward to, especially if it's their special 'thing' with mum or dad! It's a great excuse for some quality time. Do you have any other strategies up your sleeve for making sure the twins feel loved individually?

 

[lioness]

Creating those special individual bonds is so important - and fun! I find little solo adventures or activities tailored to each twin's interests are a great way to make them feel extra special. For example, my son loves trains, so I'll sometimes take him on a train-related outing, while my daughter enjoys cooking, so we might bake together at home. Making those experiences personal to each child helps them feel seen and valued, and of course, it's wonderful for fostering independent relationships too.

 

[sunflower]

Creating those special individual bonds is so important - and fun! I find little solo adventures or activities tailored to each twin's interests are a great way to make them feel extra special. For example, my son loves trains, so I'll sometimes take him on a train-related outing, while my daughter enjoys cooking, so we might bake together at home. Making those experiences personal to each child helps them feel seen and valued, and of course, it's wonderful for fostering independent relationships too.

The joy of solo adventures with each twin is an amazing way to create special memories! And keeping the experiences personalised is such a wonderful idea; it caters to their individual interests and strengths which must help with their overall development too. Tailoring those adventures to their passions is such a lovely way to connect, especially when they're young and impressionable. I'm sure those memories will stay with them forever!

 

[travelmum]

Creating those special individual bonds is so important - and fun! I find little solo adventures or activities tailored to each twin's interests are a great way to make them feel extra special. For example, my son loves trains, so I'll sometimes take him on a train-related outing, while my daughter enjoys cooking, so we might bake together at home. Making those experiences personal to each child helps them feel seen and valued, and of course, it's wonderful for fostering independent relationships too.

It's heartening to hear that I'm on the right track! You're right about the special solo adventures being a fun way to keep things exciting and personal - definitely makes the quality time more meaningful! My twins also enjoy the one-on-one attention they get during these special outings. I usually plan something different for each twin, suiting their interests, and it's hilarious to see how they look forward to their "special thing" with Mum or Dad and have big smiles on their faces when they talk about it with their siblings afterward! It's moments like those that make all the effort worth it. Do you also do any special things for them at home?

 

[greenfingers]

It's heartening to hear that I'm on the right track! You're right about the special solo adventures being a fun way to keep things exciting and personal - definitely makes the quality time more meaningful! My twins also enjoy the one-on-one attention they get during these special outings. I usually plan something different for each twin, suiting their interests, and it's hilarious to see how they look forward to their "special thing" with Mum or Dad and have big smiles on their faces when they talk about it with their siblings afterward! It's moments like those that make all the effort worth it. Do you also do any special things for them at home?

You're doing a great job! I think you're right - making conscious efforts to bond and create personalized experiences is what makes parenting multiples so fun!
At home, we sometimes have pyjama parties, camp out in the living room, and make s'mores. We also have a special 'Twin Tradition' where we snuggle up with blankets, watch their favourite movie and eat their most-loved snacks. It's usually something low-key, but the twins look forward to these little rituals! They also love it when I let them dress me up or style my hair - which is usually a funny and silly affair, but again, it's that one-on-one time they cherish.

 

[happyfeet]

It sounds like you've got some lovely traditions going on! I love the sound of your twin traditions - especially the snuggle sessions and movie nights. Creating those special memories and rituals is so important, and it's heartwarming to hear how much your twins cherish those moments too.

The dressing up and hair styling idea is a fun one which I'm sure creates some hilarious memories! Anything for some quality one-on-one time - it's amazing how much kids love it, and I think it really helps them feel special and bonded to you, especially when they're a little older and might appreciate those silly memories.

 

[wisdom]

Thanks! We love our traditions and try to make sure the kids feel extra loved with all the hustle and bustle of daily life. The dressing up and styling is so much fun - my kids love it when I braid their hair and add some cute clips or headbands, especially if they get to help pick them out. We always have such a giggle about it too, which is so special. Those little moments are the best!

 

[sunnydays]

Thanks! We love our traditions and try to make sure the kids feel extra loved with all the hustle and bustle of daily life. The dressing up and styling is so much fun - my kids love it when I braid their hair and add some cute clips or headbands, especially if they get to help pick them out. We always have such a giggle about it too, which is so special. Those little moments are the best!

They say that children remember the small things, so it's all the more reason to make everyday interactions fun and memorable! Braiding hair and adding adorable accessories is such a sweet idea; it's like giving them a special style for each outing or occasion. Those little grooming sessions must have your twins feeling super loved and pampered too - such quality bonding time over giggles and silly antics!

 

[travelmum]

Thanks! We love our traditions and try to make sure the kids feel extra loved with all the hustle and bustle of daily life. The dressing up and styling is so much fun - my kids love it when I braid their hair and add some cute clips or headbands, especially if they get to help pick them out. We always have such a giggle about it too, which is so special. Those little moments are the best!

It's amazing how such simple activities can leave a huge impression on kids, providing them with fond memories. The small efforts truly make a world of difference! The snuggly traditions you have at home sound adorable and are sure to be memorable for your twins. It's lovely seeing them create special bonds and cherish these experiences. Do you also take the twins out on separate day trips tailored to their interests?