One thing that worked surprisingly well was involving my little one in the preparation process. Toddlers love "helping," so I would give him tasks when setting up meals, like fetching spoons or arranging dinner mats. It made him feel included and responsible for something.
Also, using a timer for transitions helped me not have to bargain or negotiate as much. Setting expectations visually, with clear timelines, made it easier to transition between activities. For instance, if we were playing outside and needed to come inside soon, I'd give a five-minute warning and set a timer on my phone. Somehow, seeing the time countdown helped avoid meltdowns because he could visualize the remaining fun time.
And when tantrums happened , distraction became my best friend. Instead of rewarding good behavior with treats or toys, which felt counterintuitive to me, I found that redirecting and offering an exciting alternative worked wonders. When he threw a fit over not getting a toy at the store, for instance, acknowledging his disappointment but quickly moving to point out the awesome slide nearby helped steer him towards something more positive.
Lastly, giving choices whenever possible empowers them and helps them feel in control—a vital aspect of toddler psychology. For example, "Would you like to wear your blue shirt or red shirt today?" It's a small thing, but it gives them some agency over their lives, which is so important as they assert their new-found independence.
These methods have worked really well for us, and they make the whole experience a lot less exhausting!
