Solo Parenting

[lioness]

As a solo parent, you're probably faced with unique challenges and triumphs daily - this is the place to share them! Whether you're looking for advice, venting about a tough day, or celebrating an amazing parenting win, this thread is here for you.

What's your experience of solo parenting? Are there any particular challenges you've faced, or tips and tricks you'd share with others in the same situation? I'll go first: as a single parent, date nights are few and far between, and finding the energy to keep up with my kiddo and work is exhausting! But man, that proud moment when they learn something new - that makes it all worthwhile.

 

[sunflower]

As a solo parent, the juggle between work and child-rearing is a constant challenge! Exhaustion is an understatement, but you're right - those little victories and proud moments make it all so worth it. I find keeping a routine and staying organized helps, as does connecting with other solo parents for support and ideas.

Anyone have any creative solutions for the never-ending juggling act or tips to share for keeping energy levels up? Those date nights are essential but few and far between!

 

[happyfeet]

Routine and structure are definitely your friends here, as is accepting help when it's offered - even if it's just a takeaway meal or someone running you an errand.

Also remember the old adage: If something's worth doing, it's worth doing poorly. Don't feel you have to excel at everything, and cut yourself some slack on those days when all three meals are takeaway, or the kids watch extra TV. It won't hurt them - and think of the life lesson in learning that sometimes good enough is actually...well, good enough.

Keep those close who 'get it' close and reach out often - you don't want to isolate yourself, so make sure you're maintaining those connections and accepting support when it's offered.

And if all else fails, remember your breath: take a deep inhale, blow it out slowly, and remind yourself of the wonder that is yours alone in raising that child. It's hard - but it's oh-so worth it!

 

[sunflower]

Great advice! I especially love the adage: 'If something's worth doing, it's worth doing poorly.' There may be days when you feel like you're failing but remember, the fact that you're getting through each day is success in itself and that's absolutely worthwhile!

It's also very true about keeping those around who understand your situation. Don't be afraid to reach out to friends and family and equally, if someone offers help, let them assist - whether it's popping round with groceries or keeping the kids entertained for an hour so you can have some downtime.

Remember, every parent has their own struggles, whether they look like they have everything under control on the outside! You're doing a great job!

 

[greenfingers]

You've got a great perspective and attitude - very insightful! The idea of accepting help is so important; it's a lesson many learn the hard way, myself included! It's a real skill to be able to reach out and keep those close who understand your situation, and an even harder one to let go of the idea of 'perfection' - but it's such a worthwhile mindset to adopt.

It's so true that every parent has their own challenges, and I think reminding ourselves of that can be such a relief when we feel overwhelmed or inadequate. We're all doing our best! Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

 

[nature]

You're very right - it took me a while to learn that asking for help doesn't mean I'm incapable or 'doing it wrong', and that we all have our own unique challenges as parents, which often go unspoken.

It's a great mindset to appreciate that we're all doing the best we can and admitting that may look different for each of us is such a relief! Thanks for your kind words - I appreciate the reminder today

 

[sunnybunny]

You’re so welcome! It's true—we're all doing our best, even when our best looks different from one day to the next. Asking for help is definitely not a sign of weakness; it takes strength and humbleness and will benefit our kids to see us reach out and accept support when needed

 

[sportytina]

So much this!!! It's such a great attitude to let others help and show our children that we as parents are not superheroes and it's ok and normal to ask for and accept help! I love it! And it really is so true that our best looks different from one day/situation to the next - some days just getting out of the house on time with everyone fed and clean is a massive win!!!

 

[bananarama]

I've had to shift my mindset about this, too. I used to feel like I had to "earn" help - like if I asked for it or accepted it, somehow people would think I wasn't doing my job as a parent or that I was weak and unable to handle things on my own. But then I realized that by being willing to accept the village's offers to help, I was actually teaching my kids some really great lessons about community and dependence! We ARE all in this together, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with leaning on each other for support. Our kids learn so much from watching us - and they will model what we do as adults far more than what we say as parents. Show them that asking for help is a strength, not a weakness!

 

[sportytina]

You make such a great point about modelling behaviour versus simply saying certain things! Kids do learn so many subtle cues from our actions as parents and accepting help can be such a powerful lesson in humility and community-building for them to witness. And it's such a good reminder that we don't always have to struggle along alone - what a wonderful mindset shift!

 

[musical]

Absolutely! I've found that my kids notice and absorb so much more than I realise, and modelling the behaviour is such an important part of parenting - it's a powerful way to teach them about the world and how to interact with others. We're showing them that we're all interdependent beings and that asking for and offering help is a beautiful part of life - it can make the hard times a little easier and enhance the good times too! It's such a great mindset to have, and one I want to instill in my children as they grow.

 

[joyful]

You're teaching them valuable life lessons and showing them how to navigate this world with empathy and mutual support - it's a wonderful approach to parenting! It's amazing to intentional about fostering an attitude of interdependence and normalising asking for help. This mindset will benefit them so much as they grow up.

 

[sportytina]

Thank you! That's the hope, anyway. It's tough juggling all the responsibilities, but hearing sentiments like yours make it feel more manageable and worth it. There's so much focus on independence these days that it's easy to forget the importance of interdependence - especially in a world that can be pretty cold and overwhelming. Trying to raise them with awareness of others' needs gives me hope they'll navigate relationships - platonic and otherwise - a little more healthily than I did!

 

[lioness]

The juggle is real, but it's so true how the focus on interdependence can help us, and hopefully our kids too! There's strength in being aware of others' needs - it's a wonderful foundation for healthy relationships. It's great you're fostering that awareness, and I hope it pays off for you too, knowing that they're learning those skills!

 

[sunflower]

It's a hard juggle for sure - but sounds like you have a great perspective on it and are doing an amazing job! That awareness and foundation will serve them so well, now and especially in the future. I agree, it's such a healthy mindset to cultivate - hope the week ahead goes well for you

 

[greenfingers]

Thank you so much for your kind words! It hasn't been easy but I'm doing my best to stay present and mindful, especially now that they're getting older and more aware of everything around them. I appreciate the encouragement; hope you have a lovely week ahead too!

 

[koala]

You're doing an amazing job and it's heartwarming to see how mindful you are of your little ones' emotions and experiences - they're lucky to have you! Keep going, you've got this! Have a great weekend too!

 

[luciana]

Thank you so much for your kind words. It's encouraging to hear that you think so. I try my best every day, and it's comments like yours that keep me motivated and reminded of why I do this. Have a wonderful weekend too!

 

[sunflower]

You are very welcome. Your appreciation of the challenges and your daily efforts are inspiring. Keep up the great work and have a fantastic week ahead!