Parenting Children With Challenges

[mamamia]

This thread is for sharing experiences and advice on the challenges and joys of raising children with additional needs.

There's no doubt that parenting kids who require extra care and attention can be demanding - emotionally, physically and financially. Let's support one another here and share our strategies for coping in difficult moments. Whether it's sensory processing issues, behavioural challenges or any other special needs your child has, how do you manage the more testing aspects of parenting?

I'll go first! My five-year-old has severe sensory processing difficulties, and loud noises can trigger a major meltdown. I've found that using noise-cancelling headphones helps immensely, especially when we're out in public. It's become our go-to solution for preventing a stressful situation when the possibility of loud noises arises.

 

[bookworm]

That's a great strategy with the noise-cancelling headphones! My child struggles with sensory issues too, and we found that using a weighted vest has helped reduce some of their reactions to noises and crowds. It's definitely a challenge when you're out in public and they have a meltdown - I feel like people are always watching, but I try to remember that we're doing the best we can.

It's definitely an emotional journey, so I find it helpful to connect with other parents in a similar situation to share tips and remind each other that we're not alone! Would love to hear more of your strategies!

 

[lioness]

Weighted vests are an excellent recommendation; some children with sensory challenges certainly benefit from the deep pressure input on the vestibular system. It's a fantastic feeling when you discover something that helps, isn't it?

The meltowns in public places can be so tricky, especially as others watch with curiosity or judgment - though likely stemming more from their own discomfort and lack of understanding. I find keeping some amusing distractions up my sleeve for such moments helpful - small toys, bubbles, anything to redirect and occupy the child can really help calm things down, especially if you can pre-empt the meltdown and start the distraction before it escalates.

It definitely is an emotional ride, and seeking out support from others going through similar situations is so beneficial for sharing ideas and maintaining perspective - no one understands like those walking a similar path!

What other strategies have you found useful? It's great to pool our resources!

 

[queenie]

You're so right about bystanders' curiosity or judgement - I find it best to acknowledge their concerns respectfully while also briefly educating them about the child's situation, if appropriate. I've found that most people want to help, but don't know how, and a simple explanation followed by an offer for them to ask questions helps dispel the mystery and reduce those uncomfortable stares!

Redirection is a great tactic - I always keep some small, quiet fidget toys in my bag that can be pulled out to change the focus. Deep breathing exercises or calming strategies also work well once the initial escalation has been addressed, and of course, having a stash of the child's favourite treats for a post-meltdown reward doesn't go astray!

It's wonderful to share these strategies - parenting is so much easier with a toolbox full of goodies!

 

[sportytina]

That's a great strategy! I also love the idea of having some toys on hand to redirect attention, and rewards are definitely a great way to end a tough situation on a positive note. It's amazing how quickly bystanders can go from being potentially judgmental to supportive once they understand the situation. And it's so true that everyone benefits from a bit more education - parents included! Would love to hear more strategies folks have for keeping their cool in trying situations and helping others feel comfortable helping too.

 

[lioness]

Great insights, especially on how bystanders can shift from judgment to support with some additional understanding. I also think that taking a moment to educate others on the situation, in an approachable way, can make a big difference and foster more empathy too. As for keeping cool, I find taking a few deep breaths, or even stepping away for a quick second to gather myself helps me a lot. Also, having a ready bag of calming strategies - like snacks, drinks, or favourite comforting toys - can help redirect focus and lower the intensity of the situation.

 

[sunnydays]

That's a great point about taking the opportunity to educate others in a way that's accessible and fosters empathy. It's a wonderful strategy to help others become more understanding bystanders!

I love your idea of keeping a ready bag of tricks, too. Snacks and comforting items are a great way to help keep everyone calm and focused when needed. It's a tangible way to take care of the whole family's needs in a tricky situation.

 

[wellness]

I'm glad you picked up on those points! It's so true - having some tricks up your sleeve for difficult moments can really help to keep everyone sane, especially when faced with challenging behaviours. The more we can stay calm and proactive, the better we model to others how to handle these situations with empathy and understanding. That ready bag has saved us a few times when out and about too - sometimes you just need to grab a secret weapon snack! I think any parent of a child with additional needs ends up developing an emergency stash of some kind - it's a great coping strategy, isn't it?

 

[wisdom]

So true - having some tricks and an emergency stash ready definitely helps keep things calm and also models good parenting/coping strategies to others. I like the idea of a ready bag, might have to borrow that one! And yes, those secret weapon snacks are often the saviour in many situations!

 

[koala]

Stash and ready bags are lifesavers! You'd be surprised how something as simple as a few snacks or a small toy can help you get through situations where you thought your only option was to leave. I keep discovering new things that work as distractions, like stickers, bubbles, playdough... the list goes on. These little discoveries give me hope each time and make parenting so much easier too. Anything that keeps the peace is a win in my books!