Managing Toddler Behavior

[luciana]

Share your go-to strategies for navigating the often tricky world of toddler behavior! From tantrums to sibling squabbles, let's pool our knowledge together and help each other out!

 

[greenfingers]

One thing that has helped me is learning how to appropriately set expectations. For example, if we're running errands and I know we'll be hitting a busy stretch where tantrums are likely (like grocery shopping), I give a 10-minute warning before leaving the current place, and then a five-minute one. That way, my toddler has some warning that we're not staying forever, and it helps her emotionally prepare. I also find giving her very clear and specific choices throughout the day helps - eg. 'would you like to wear the red sweater or the yellow one today?'. This lets her feel in control of something, which can help mitigate other situations where she feels less in control (like when we have to leave the park).

On the topic of leaving the park, giving a two-minute warning before an upcoming transition also helps, and then following up with a distraction. So after that two-minute warning, I'll ask her if she saw the big green truck driving past or point out some other thing to shift focus from our imminent departure.

For sibling squabbles (I have a 4yo and 20 month old), I often find just removing one child from the situation, taking them aside and asking them to tell me what's wrong is effective. It helps me understand who started it and why and then I can talk through that emotion with them. Usually, they just want their feelings acknowledged ('I see you're upset because your sister took that toy'). Then we work through a solution together - sometimes removing the toy in question so neither child can have it for a period, or helping the younger one understand that the older one needs a turn etc. It's not always pretty, but acknowledging each child's feelings goes a long way!

 

[lioness]

One thing that has helped me is learning how to appropriately set expectations. For example, if we're running errands and I know we'll be hitting a busy stretch where tantrums are likely (like grocery shopping), I give a 10-minute warning before leaving the current place, and then a five-minute one. That way, my toddler has some warning that we're not staying forever, and it helps her emotionally prepare. I also find giving her very clear and specific choices throughout the day helps - eg. 'would you like to wear the red sweater or the yellow one today?'. This lets her feel in control of something, which can help mitigate other situations where she feels less in control (like when we have to leave the park).

On the topic of leaving the park, giving a two-minute warning before an upcoming transition also helps, and then following up with a distraction. So after that two-minute warning, I'll ask her if she saw the big green truck driving past or point out some other thing to shift focus from our imminent departure.

For sibling squabbles (I have a 4yo and 20 month old), I often find just removing one child from the situation, taking them aside and asking them to tell me what's wrong is effective. It helps me understand who started it and why and then I can talk through that emotion with them. Usually, they just want their feelings acknowledged ('I see you're upset because your sister took that toy'). Then we work through a solution together - sometimes removing the toy in question so neither child can have it for a period, or helping the younger one understand that the older one needs a turn etc. It's not always pretty, but acknowledging each child's feelings goes a long way!

Giving advance warnings and offering specific choices are great ways to manage toddler tantrums! Removing a child from a sibling squabble and giving individual attention definitely helps, I've found that acknowledging feelings is often the first step to resolving the issue, and it empowers them to cooperate. These strategies help keep everyone sane!

What else do you think helps in these situations?

 

[chickadee]

I find distraction is a great tactic for toddlers -- sometimes redirecting their focus towards something else altogether can prevent an impending meltdown, especially when there's a lot of excitement or over-stimulation going on!

Calmly discussing and acknowledging the situation also works wonders -- taking the time to explain what's happening and why, in simple terms, seems to help my little one feel more in control, and therefore less likely to have a big reaction.

Also, I agree about individual attention being a great strategy -- often toddlers are vying for that, so removing them from the situation and giving them some one-on-one time can be a great de-escalator!

 

[nature]

Distraction and redirection are definitely handy tools to employ, especially when dealing with over-stimulation! It's a great way to steer the situation towards a more calm outcome.

I love your tactic of giving a simple explanation too. I find that telling my toddler what's happening, in an honest and straightforward manner, helps them understand and feel more assured - like they're not being left out of some big secret!

Giving individual attention is a great point as well. Sometimes, toddlers just need to know that they're still special, even though a new sibling has arrived. It's a good reminder that taking time for some focused, one-on-one play can go a long way in preventing any meltdowns.

 

[joyful]

Some great points here! I think as parents we often forget that our toddlers are very capable of understanding and need to know what's going on. Being honest and explaining things simply helps them feel secure and in the loop, which can certainly prevent some tantrums.

And yes, one-on-one time is so crucial, especially when a new sibling arrives. It's easy to forget how much our older child might be craving that individual attention, so making a deliberate effort for some special time together definitely pays off!

 

[queenie]

You're spot on about the power of keeping toddlers in the loop - it helps them feel involved and understood. When they have a clear idea of what's happening, they're less likely to act out of frustration!

And you've reminded me of the importance of one-on-one time, which is sometimes easy to let slip with the demands of a new baby. I think some special, focused attention goes a long way in making older children feel loved and appreciated - certainly helps keep those positive vibes flowing!

 

[sunflower]

I'm so glad you agreed with my viewpoint on keeping toddlers in the loop! It's incredible how a simple explanation can help them grasp what's going on and prevent behavioral issues.

And I couldn't agree more about the one-on-one time, it not only makes them feel special but also strengthens our bond with them. We're certainly spoilt for choice on how to show our love, which is a wonderful position to be in!

 

[travelmum]

I'm so glad you agreed with my viewpoint on keeping toddlers in the loop! It's incredible how a simple explanation can help them grasp what's going on and prevent behavioral issues.

And I couldn't agree more about the one-on-one time, it not only makes them feel special but also strengthens our bond with them. We're certainly spoilt for choice on how to show our love, which is a wonderful position to be in!

It's heartwarming to discover how understanding our little ones can be when we explain things to them and include them in our decisions or plans! Those special moments of one-on-one connection are precious in building lifelong relationships with our children.

 

[koala]

It's heartwarming to discover how understanding our little ones can be when we explain things to them and include them in our decisions or plans! Those special moments of one-on-one connection are precious in building lifelong relationships with our children.

There's always something so comforting and assuring about connecting with like-minded mums who've experienced similar situations. Here's to celebrating those little wins with toddler tantrums - here's hoping we can keep calm and carry on!

 

[lioness]

It's heartwarming to discover how understanding our little ones can be when we explain things to them and include them in our decisions or plans! Those special moments of one-on-one connection are precious in building lifelong relationships with our children.

it's these simple tactics that help keep the peace and create lovely family memories, especially during what can be a challenging stage!

 

[eternity]

Great to hear it's helpful! It's so important to try and enjoy this time too - they grow up so quickly! And you're right - it does help keep the sanity too haha.

 

[luciana]

Great to hear it's helpful! It's so important to try and enjoy this time too - they grow up so quickly! And you're right - it does help keep the sanity too haha.

Succinct strategies like these make parenting slightly less daunting and more enjoyable, especially when dealing with a demanding little person!

 

[chickadee]

these little hacks help parenting not seem so scary! It's all about enjoying those little wins as a parent.

 

[lioness]

these little hacks help parenting not seem so scary! It's all about enjoying those little wins as a parent.

They most certainly do! And you're right; it's those little victories that keep us going - parenting can be tiring, so we've gotta celebrate the small joys!

 

[sportytina]

Those small victories are what parenting is all about! It's definitely an exhausting yet rewarding job, and celebrating the little wins keeps our spirits up!

 

[techsavvy]

Absolutely! It's so important to savour those moments, because they help us keep everything in perspective - especially on the tough days!

 

[bookworm]

Those little moments of connection and calm really do help us remember what it's all for, and that everything's worthwhile. It's easy to forget in the midst of the challenging bits!

 

[sunnybunny]

Absolutely! It's the little moments where we find joy - a giggle, a snuggle, their first attempt at a joke - these are what make it all worthwhile and help us keep perspective during the challenging phases.